Embrace your clearness committee
“Whenever I
climb, I am followed by a dog named Ego.” –Friedrich Nietzche
It’s a story about
Parker Palmer,
a Quaker educator and author of the book Let
Your Life Speak, in which he writes about a time he was offered the
presidency of a large educational institution. He was thrilled with the thought
of the status, pay raise, and influence he would have with the new position.
But before he
accepted, he convened a group of friends to serve as what the Quakers have called since the 1600s, a “clearness
committee.” The “Clearness Committee”
protects individual identity and integrity while drawing on the wisdom of other
people, allowing a person who is seeking clarity of vision on an issue to gain
the wisdom of a group. The sole mission of the Clearness Committee is not to
have the right answers, but to craft respectful and supportive questions that
help the person find their own heart-centered answers. The Clearness Committee
honors these inner answers - the ones that we must truly own.
At first the
questions of the group centered around things like his vision for the
institution. Then someone asked what seemed like a very simple question:
"Parker, what would you like about being president?"
He started listing
things he wouldn't
like -- the politics, raising money, no time for teaching. His friends
asked again: "But what would
you like?" Irritated, he answered, "I wouldn't like to give up my
summer vacations, I wouldn't like..." For the third time they said,
"But Parker, what would
you like about it?"
Finally reaching
deep inside, in a small voice, he called up the only honest answer he had,
appalling himself as he uttered the words, “I guess what I'd really like most
is getting my picture in the paper with the word president under it.”
The group was silent.
At last someone spoke: "Parker" he said, "can you think of an
easier way to get your picture in the paper?" They all laughed and they all
knew what his decision would be.
Certainly there’s
a message in his story about understanding and owning our personal motives,
facing (and naming) the ego truth in what we do. Have you ever daydreamed about
what your business card would look like with a more impressive-sounding title
on it? (“Queen of All She Surveys” or “High Priestess of Perpetual Motion” are
viable options.) Am I doing what I do because I really believe it needs doing –
and (just think of the implications!) because I actually enjoy it? Or am I
doing it just because it’s a stepping stone? Do I find myself doodling in the
margins of books what my new title will be and what they’ll say about me in the
New York Times?
My 12-year-old
daughter was nominated to be in the Junior Honor Society last year and this.
Last year, I didn’t even know about the nomination, but this year she slipped
up and left the announcement on the dining room table. When I found it and
gushed about the honor, she said, very quietly and without moving her head, that
she wasn’t going to join. “Why?!,” I gasped in a horrified you’re - being - recognized - you - have - to - accept - it mother voice. She’s
uninterested. “My life is really full,” she explained, “with things I actually like doing, like the softball team and
playing tuba in the band.” “But,” I sputtered, “it’ll look good on your college
application.” (Did I mention she’s just 12?) And so, a lifetime of impressing
others could have begun. Instead, she didn’t join the honor society, choosing to
run the bases rather than sit in meetings. She’s my best teacher.
There’s also another
important message, I think, below the surface: do I have a “clearness
committee,” a “circle of trust” that I can convene at these important moments
in my life? The answer for me is yes, though far flung--from
In another of his
books, A
Hidden Wholeness, Parker Palmer offers this view of a “circle of trust,”
akin to the Clearness Committee:
“Here is one way to
understand the relationships in a circle of trust: they combine unconditional
love, or regard, with hopeful expectancy, creating a space that both safeguards
and encourages the inner journey. In such a space, we are freed to hear our own
truth, touch what brings us joy, become self-critical about our faults, and
take risky steps toward change—knowing that we will be accepted no matter what
the outcome.”
I love that
definition—unconditional love with hopeful expectancy. Who is in your circle of
trust, both safeguarding and encouraging your inner journey, simultaneously nurturing
and challenging you? With whom do you know you will be accepted no matter what
the outcome?
~*~ 37 Days:
Do it Now Challenge ~*~
Name the five wealthiest
people in the world.
Name the last five winners of the Miss America
contest.
Name the last five people who have won the Nobel or
Pulitzer Prize.
Name the last half dozen Academy Award winner for
best actor and actress.
Name the last decade's worth of World Series
winners.
How did you do?
I know I did horrendously. The point is this: We
forget yesterday's headliners. These people are the best in their fields. But
the applause dies. Trophies tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and
awards are buried with their owners.
Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one.
List a few teachers who aided your journey through
school.
Name three friends who have helped you through a
difficult time.
Name five people who have taught you something
worthwhile.
Think of a few people who have made you feel
appreciated and special.
Name half a dozen heroes whose stories have
inspired you.
I think you get the point. I know I did. Embrace your clearness committee.
List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
Posted by: Master | 26 March 2007 at 04:06